Then and Now

Then: “It’s a beautiful day! Let's get outside”. *Walks around the block, sees flowers, dogs, humans, trees.

Now: “It’s a beautiful day! Let’s get outside”. *Dons snorkel gear to swim off the boat, sees turtles, fish, coral, eels, squid, sharks and other cool shit.

Then: “Ugh we have so much laundry, I'm going to knock it out this afternoon while I get the rest of my work done.”

Now: “Ugh we have so much laundry, let's research where we can get it done, or better yet do it ourselves, sail the boat over there, sort I and pack it in to bags we can carry, lower the dingy, load it and drive it over to the location, use as many machines as we can to get them washed, select what we want to hang up on the boat and then pump quarters into the low heat dryers for the rest, fold it all up and repack, load it into the dingy and return it to the boat without it getting sprayed with salt water, and put away.”

Then: “Let's go out for dinner tonight!” *Chooses from the best food any country has to offer within a 50 mile radius of house

Now: “Let's go out for dinner tonight!” *Chooses from roti, chicken with rice and cabbage salad, or burgers and fries

Then: “I need some alone time.” *Draws a bath and relaxes for 2 hours while streaming Netflix from my laptop.

Now: “I need some alone time.” *Moves 5 feet away from the nearest human.

Then: “I'd like to pick up a few new things for the kids.” *Makes multiple clothing orders which arrive in 24 hours

Now: “The kids have no underwear that fit them.” *Researches a mail delivery location, confirms address, places order, tracks order over several weeks, confirms order clears customs, pays duty, moves boat to location of mail delivery service, dingy to shore, bus or walk to location, fill out paperwork, pick up package, return to dingy, return package to boat, unpack and try on underwear, condense packaging and take back to shore for garbage or recycling.

Then: “What do you want to do this weekend?” *Chooses trail to hike, family to visit, friends to call on, grocery store to shop at

Now: “What do you want to do this weekend?” *When is this weekend?

Then: (7:00am) “Kids! It's time for school! Let's get moving!”

Now: (10:00am) “Kids. We have to do at least some school from time to time. Let's get moving.”

Then: “I'm just going to pick up a few things from the store for dinner tonight.” *walks to store, is back in 30 mins with fresh ingredients for dinner

Now: “I'm just going to go through our canned goods and use up what's about to expire from Dominica for dinner tonight.” *pulls out 800 cans to get at the rusted can of corn or coconut milk at the bottom of the bilge

Then: “I hear the sunset was beautiful tonight; look at these IG posts!” *holds up phone to show husband from across the couch

Now: “Holy shit look at the sunset tonight. I better take something for IG!” *holds up phone to grab a quick pic of husband and self

Then: “Let's have some beach time!” *Researches beaches within a reasonable flight, reasonable cost, sometime in the next 6 months, for at least a week, buys kids new bathing suits, hats, sunnies, towels, sunscreen, books, beach bags, beach toys and eventually goes on vacation, packs it all up and drives to a beach.

Now: “Let's have some beach time!” *Spends 20 minutes yelling at each other to grab the water bottles, beach chairs, sunscreen and get in the damn dingy!!!

Then: “I feel gross, I'm going to have a quick shower” *steps out of shower 10 minutes later buffed, shaved, deep conditioned and sparkling clean

Now: “I feel gross, I'm going to have a quick shower” *steps out of the shower 10 seconds later, satisfied with being slightly less salty

Then: “Oh man I'm tired, let's get to bed early.” *Goes to bed at 11:00pm

Now: “Oh man I'm tired, let's get to bed early.” *Goes to bed at 8:30pm

Then: “Hey kids, what did you learn today in school?” *pregnant pause followed by list of subjects they had that day

Now: “Hey kids, what did you learn today in school?” *pregnant pause....”we don't go to school mom!”

Then: “We need to cut the lawn.”

Now: “We need to scrape the ecosystem off the hull because I can hear fish chomping on it at night.”

Then: “I think this shirt / these pants / this outfit is too tight / revealing / unflattering”

Now: “Me lounging all day in a cheeky bikini with beer and cellulite”

Then: Working out, yoga, meditating, eating light, lots of green tea, eyelashes, salon…stressed, tired, unhappy with appearance, shoulder problems, knee problems, working hard, fighting colds.

Now: Not working out, food compromises, too hot for tea, cuts own hair, zero make-up…tanned, relaxed, strong, balanced, filled out and content.

Then: “Where should we go next?” *Dreams of future trips

Now: “Where should we go next?” *Moves to new location

(We know balloons are TERRIBLE for the environment, this one escaped from a birthday party down the beach and Grace played with it for a long time before we popped it and disposed of properly.)

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This comparison is a bit tongue-in-cheek, but also is true. It's not an assessment of which reality is better than the other. They are just different. And in some ways...very very different. I am so grateful we've been able to live in such different realities :)

Who knows what realities are in our future?

Much love,

MH